I am Mommy Dearest

Why am I mommy dearest? Well, I will try to be brief.
I've always loved the movie mommy dearest. It was GREAT!!! The whole wire hanger thing made me fear doing my laundry, that's for sure!
I am NOT the typical Utah mom. Nope. Not a mormon, not a stay-at-home parent, not the cookie baker........no, no, no. Now, don't get me wrong. I love my kids. All of them. But, having a child young taught me something. I learned I could not lose myself to mother-hood. Nor could I lose my sense of humor. Or, at least the sense of humor I thought I had. And.......I had to be me. And I wanted my kids to be them. I'm not a slave to mother-hood. It is part of who I am, but it isn't all I have. Eventually, kids grow up... move out and have kids of their own. So, I've lived my life my way. And here it is.
When Bob and Dani were young, I use to tease them and tell them they couldn't call me "mom" in public. I told them they had to call me, "Ma'am" or "Mommy Dearest". And at night, I would make them say: "I love you mommy dearest" before going to bed. I found this very humorous since they had NO IDEA where it came from!
Dee's youngest daughter, Regan, had a hard time figuring out what to call me. At times, she would call me "Mom" or "Mommy" and we would all wind up confused. I told her if she wanted to call me mom, she had to call me "Mommy Dearest". It only took one time. And now, it's pretty much what all the kids call me. Even my birthday cards say: "mommy dearest" on them.
I can be a tough mom, I can be a nice mom. Just depends on the day. Now, Dee.........she is the perfect mom! She does everything the right way. She bakes cookies, makes great dinners, spoils 'em rotten and is the perfect role model. I think we even each-other out a bit!
I'm honest about how much the kids irritate and annoy me. I'm honest with the things they say and do. I'm not embarrassed by their behaviors, I find it funny. I think parents who put on this show that their kids are perfect suck. Really? Yeah, I bet your kid has NEVER said a swear word, stolen anything or drew in crayon on the wall. Yeah, standing around the water-cooler talking about the 2 goals your kid made at the soccer game last week bores me to DEATH!!!!! Give me something good, people! Give me the real world!!!
That's where it's at. Ta-da!